Though there is no way it can be proven, most people say in China, cats are only eaten in Guangdong Province, but in the rest of Asia, they are routinely and commonly consumed. And it is not just poor people who eat them, just this past December a well-known Chinese billionaire with a fondness for cat meat, died after eating his favorite dish; it was said a rival slipped a local poison into his cat stew. The notoriety surrounding his death prompted activists to call for a ban on selling cat meat. Professor Chang Jiwen of the Chinese Academy of the Social Sciences, a proponent on changing the law stated, “Cats and dogs are loyal friends to humans. A ban on eating them would show China has reached a new level of civilization.” But dogs, specifically, are another matter. It is widely believed that dog meat has medicinal properties, that it makes you sweat in the summer, and if eaten in winter, you will never be cold. It is believed to rev up the circulation and cool the yang. It is an ageless tradition and though, contrary to popular belief, pets and strays are not eaten, the dogs sold to restaurants are raised on farms for their meat, just as cows are. Comedian/actor Denis Leary once observed: we only want to save the cute animals. Maybe so. If you could ride a tuna at Marine World you probably wouldn’t want to eat them. Otters, cute, cows—get in the truck. Chickens? Can’t make them into McNuggets fast enough. If pigs licked themselves clean as cats do, they might have a chance, but they are way too slovenly and bacon assures they will always be on the menu. Snakes, eat all you want. Halibut? Too fugly, you’ll never see a petition to save the halibut. And it’s hard to drum up sympathy for eels, for iguana, for pigeons. If somebody suddenly discovered that rats contained oil more beneficial than omega 3, they would cease to be a plague in modern cities. Goats? Have at ‘em. Sheep? Eat all you want—start with the veal, you know, the babies. And so I approached the dog restaurant with a Greek Chorus singing hypocritical odes to me and my multiple personalities, (if you will allow me some latitude) my Jim Harrison-like raw and the cooked side, my Buddhist monk vegan side, my pirate—eat whatever the fug you want side, and the side of me that believes food is medicine, raises consciousness, contributes to enlightenment, sustains good health. At this point, I was just wondering if they had a table big enough to fit me and all the competing voices in my head. Then, I saw the poster in the window. It stopped me cold. Look at this: Was it supposed to attract customers or repel them? What sadist hung that in the window? Abruptly I realized that it would be perfectly okay for me to go through this life without ever eating dog, cat, horse, and it’s not as if I had chickened out . . . I opted out, willingly. I may be a hypocrite but I’m a happy hypocrite.
They say you are what you eat . . . well, at least, so far, I am not a dog, a horse, a cat, though I am a beetle, sea grub, snake, cockroach, Rocky Mountain oyster, fried brain sandwich, spam tostada, iceberg lettuce, cheese whiz, deep fried Twinkie, white bread toast, gallo pinto, chicken feet, stinky tofu, thousand year egg, and the blue plate special at the Greyhound bus station in Billings, Montana. I wonder, what are you? I would love for you to comment.
2 Comments
moonmadman
12/15/2012 11:45:09 pm
I have historically declined to eat horsemeat sushi in Kumamoto City, Japan, as I don't enjoy riding or eating them. I do not mind skinning eels, shucking live clams and oysters and 'priesting' large tasty rainbow trout, although it is not my favorite part of the process. I take my 'predator' role pretty seriously and eat everything I kill, with the exclusion of mosquitos and flies and the occasional house mouse. I have transcended the need to eat Twinkies and/or potato chips, but would at least 'taste' dog. There is a complete school of scholars who believe, based on their scientific inquiries, that we homo sapiens, traveled with dogs in a symbiotic relationship and in difficult times, we would eat them. Not the most friendly symbiosis, but an effective strategy for staying alive. (Editor's note: I have two dogs and know their habits well; I would never consider eating them, if for no other reason than their lack of ingestion discretion). And yes, I do not eat pork for similar reasons...
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Mary
12/23/2012 11:25:00 pm
You are right this was okay to read...I am glad you willingly dropped out. It was a brilliantly written piece thou. They do say you are what you eat and also you crave what you eat...so I am glad you are not craving dog right now....have fun and keep up the great writing it is so entertaining.!!!!! love ya m
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